I never published Caleb's birth story because i wanted it to be perfect, but with another one on the way I just need to get it out there!
** NOTE: If birth isn't your thing or hearing about childbirth makes you squirm, this post probably isn't for you.
Caleb’s Birth Story
During my whole pregnancy I tried to convince myself that I
would deliver past my due date. That’s what my mom had done for most of her pregnancies,
I was a first time mom, and I don’t deal well with disappointment. At our 20
week ultrasound Caleb was measuring 5 days ahead of growth so I made myself
believe that I would have a big baby born late. However, I had this secret
sneaking suspicion that he would be a bit early but I tried to ignore and deny
that that could be true!
On Wednesday, January 8th I went to an intense
yoga class. Half way through I felt “off”. I am very aware of my body and felt
like I had gas but it was different. I went home where I started having back
pains every 10 minutes or so. I decided to cook up a bunch of egg dishes to put
in the freezer. Later that evening John and I went to our friend's house for an Advocare leaders dinner. I was still having the back pain
about every 7 minutes or so and it would last for about 1 minute. I had John
push on my back during our meeting and I told everyone our baby was going to
born in a week or two.
I finally went to bed at midnight and shot awake at 2:30am
with the ever so present back pain. I took a herb called Valarium to go back to
sleep, but I would drift in and out of sleep and stayed in bed until
5:45am. I woke up to go to the
bathroom at 6am and I had the “bloody show”. I told John this meant we would
have a baby soon and this was indeed real labor. I was terrified and felt so
unprepared! Immediately I threw up everything that I had had for dinner the night
before. I was really worried because this was supposed to be my nutrition to
get me through the biggest workout of my life!
I laid down on the couch and called my midwife, Vickii,
around 8am. She told me to rest, stay off my feet, and to check back in with
her later to see if I could keep anything down. I labored on our couch on my
side while John worked from home and fed me bits of toast, rehydrate, and
water. I was riveted to peppermint oil and kept sniffing it to prevent the
nausea! I had no idea at the time that peppermint oils should not be used later
in pregnancy because it can decrease your milk supply.
I called our midwife after I threw up a second time and she
recommended I come into her office to get out of the house, get some acupuncture
for the nausea, and to check my progress. Getting out of the house and to her
office was the worst! I was so uncomfortable in the car felt like I was sitting
on a bowling ball. My contractions were so intense because I had been lying
down for most of my labor, and now I was upright. I was moaning in the car, and
since we didn’t have AC the windows were down and I remember being nervous
someone would hear me at a bus stop.
When I arrived at our Vickii’s office, the acupuncture really
helped with the nausea and I felt a lot better being able to talk with her. I
lay down for my internal exam and braced myself to be told, “well, you are at
1cm and we have a while to go!”. What I heard instead shocked the living
daylights out of me. She told me that I was 8cm and almost fully effaced on one
side. I panicked because I wasn’t ready for this baby to arrive! Vickii quickly
informed her partner midwife Nicole and their student midwife Wendy that we needed
to go back to our place as soon as possible because a baby was coming soon!
When we arrived at my home it was very chaotic. The bed needed to be prepared
for the delivery or post delivery if I delivered elsewhere in our home, the tub
needed to be inflated, all the medical supplies needed to be organized and laid
out, and I needed to call my friend Stephanie to come over to help with the
labor. All the chaos caused my contractions to slow down significantly, especially
since I decided to take the role of host instead of laboring mother.
Around 5pm, Vickii suggested that everyone leave the house
so john and I could be alone and hopefully my labor would pick back up to the
intensity level it had been at before the environment changed. Stephanie went
home and all the midwives went for a walk. It felt much better to be alone with
John. John was an amazing support, working right along side me for every
contraction. At this point I always felt the contractions in my back, I never
had any sensation in my tummy area. I really wanted John to push on my low back
to block the pain. This was amazing and worked really well to minimize the
sensations of the contractions. The midwives came back an hour later to check
on me and I told them I was doing much better and the contractions had picked
up. I asked them to continue to stay outside and they went to grab some tacos
for dinner down the street. When they came back I was checked again and I was
still at 8cm. I lay on the right side to open up that side of my cervix. After
throwing up again around 9pm ( I lost
track at this point with how many times I had thrown up), I wanted to get into
the pool, hoping to get some relief and to be able to eat. I had a smoothie and
some bread in the tub but mostly felt like I was drifting away and wasn’t
grounded. I got the break that I was looking for but unfortunately it wasn’t
helping move my labor along and my blood pressure was getting higher and
higher. Caleb’s fetal tones were good and he did not seem to be in distress,
only his poor mother was.
I got out of the tub and Nicole suggested we get go for a
walk, do some side lunges, and stay on my feet to get gravity to help. Lunging
during a contraction wasn’t any fun but it definitely helped! I got all dressed
up to go outside. I had on the most ridiculous outfit. A yellow sundress with a
pink sports bra, black socks, pink ballet flats, and to top it all off John’s
grey flannel shirt. Walking around the block was refreshing and hilarious. I
would waddle to a shadow when I felt a contraction coming on and John and I
would slow dance while he pushed on my low back. I didn’t want anyone to see
me, and I would play it cool if someone was walking too. Nothing to see here
folks! Just a mama in a ridiculous outfit taking an evening stroll and deciding
to slow dance while moaning. No big deal.
When we got back inside my midwives wanted to give me an IV
to rehydrate me and since I couldn’t keep anything down still. I sat on the exercise ball while
Nicole attempted to put an IV into my twisty veins that were not cooperating.
After several attempts she decided to put the IV in the crook of my arm. I
needed to keep the arm straight so she taped a wooden spoon to my arm. Talk
about improvisation!
John and I went into the bathroom so I could labor in the
dark on the toilet. The IV was hanging from the shower curtain, I couldn’t move
my arm because of the spoon, and I
was still in that ridiculous yellow getup. I was a sight to be seen for sure. John started praying for me, and I truly believe that God showed up and surrounded me with his love and protection. John was my rock during those moments.
I didn’t feel the urge to push but I did little pushes to hopefully
move things along because I was ready to meet my baby! After a while I stood up
and felt like I was going to faint, so I told the midwives I needed to lie
down. I moved to the bed on my side, hoping to get some relief and rest before
the big event. John nailed a nail into our bedroom so my IV could hand there
while I was on the bed.
Within 5
minutes of lying down I my body started to push and I started to shake and
quiver. This was not the rest I was looking for! Pushing was the most crazy
experience. My baby and my body took over and I simply partnered with the
pushing my body was doing to help Caleb come out. I was on my left side and
Wendy (who is super strong) was holding my right leg up while John was spooning
me and pushing on my back. The midwives asked me if I wanted to stay in my
yellow sundress and pink sports bra, or if I wanted to undress to welcome my
baby skin to skin. I quickly scrambled between a contraction to undress. I was
naked except for John’s black socks. I started screaming while pushing in a
high pitched yell, and the midwives kept telling me between contractions “Low
tones Ebey, high pitched tones aren’t going to bring him down”. I remember
pushing and yelling “LOW LOW LOW” to remind myself as I slipped into a baritone
moan. I felt a gush of relief during a push and I knew my water had broken. The
next push Vickii told me she could see lots of hair and she guided my hand to
touch the top of Caleb’s head. One big push later and his entire head was out.
I think he did a little cry when his body was still inside of me! I didn’t
quite know what to do next and Vickii instructed me to push my baby out the
rest of the way while she guided him out. John sat up to watch and with a final
hurrah he was out and delivered onto my chest. Feeling that slippery naked bundle of baby was the most
surreal experience. Time all but stopped as he let out a big wail and started
kicking his way up my chest. As I was holding him I reached down and felt his
man parts and exclaimed “it’s a boy, I can feel his balls!”. He started doing
the breast crawl and I brought him up to nurse. He latched on like a champ and
soon enough my placenta was delivered. About 20-30 minutes after delivery, the
midwives were shoveling sweet potatoes, a placenta smoothie with berries, and
lots of honey water down my throat and I was gladly gobbling everything up
because my appetite had returned with a vengeance!
A hour later the midwives had John hold him so I could
shower off, go pee, and get checked for tears. My tummy felt so funny! It
looked like I was 6 months pregnant still but it felt like I had a hole in my
insides. When I got checked out I had two external tears and an internal tear
from his elbow. Caleb was born with his shoulders sideways and his hand near
his face. This may have been a part of the prolonged late stages of labor.
While I was sutured up Caleb slept on John’s chest on our bed while I gripped
the living daylights out of his hand. Apparently John fell asleep and had no
recollection that I was gripping his hand so hard. I think getting sewn up was
worse than pushing a baby out, and from what I have heard, Vickii is one of the
most amazing people you could ask for to sew you up after having a baby.
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| Moments after Caleb was born |
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| The first time John got to hold our little one |
