Valentine's Day

Valentine's Day was amazing. We have never "gone out" for Valentine's Day or celebrated it with any level of flair and importance. We used the day as an excuse to be intentional and get out of the house for a little date night. John planned the whole evening as a surprise and we had a little sleepy Valentine who came with us too! We had the most amazing food at El Pescador Fish Market in La Jolla. John got fish Tacos and I had scallops. I could eat that every night! We then traveled to Sprinkles and I got some gluten-free red velvet cupcakes.

 The best part about the evening was the intentional time we were able to spend together. We had such amazing conversations and the gifts John gave me were so incredibly thoughtful. My husband is so cute and adorable! He wrote me so many love letters before we were married and has continued to write to me every chance he gets. I got the cutest card with homemade coupons and I couldn't have been happier. I have been itching for a massage and John got a great referral from a friend. My truly thoughtful husband also gave me a coupon to have a marriage counseling session at The Soul Care House. Every since we have been married we have talked about wanting to regularly schedule a counseling session once per quarter or a few times a year for "marriage maintenance". five years later and its finally happening. We care about our marriage and want to tend to it in the same way a gardener pulls out weeds and tills the soil to create even more growth and abundance. I am super, super excited! So many couples that we look up to and admire have gone to counseling for "marriage maintenance". Why wait for a ton of problems to come up? If you care about your car, then you schedule all of your appointments to change the oil, get new tires, replace that part that is wearing out, and get regular tune-ups. And my guess is that bill is usually a whole lot more than any counseling session could cost you. We care a whole lot more about our marriage than we do about what car we drive, and I am excited so invest in our marriage this way!

This Valentine's Day has also given me a chance to reflect on my relationship with John and how much everything is changing so fast! I am so thankful I have such an amazing husband to journey on this roller coaster disguised under the word "parenthood". But it's hard. AND I knew it would be hard. And yet it still surprised me how quickly lack of sleep, a drastic change in our "normal" lives, and a little person who has needs too can create opportunities for, well, let's be blunt: TENSION. I think because John and I have such am amazingly seamless relationship before Caleb was born, God is now using the addition of Caleb to grow and stretch us into even deeper intimacy as a couple. Tension for us has been an opportunity to really talk things out and communicate with each other to work it out and smooth things over. I am so grateful for John's willingness to work out the kinks and navigate this parenthood journey with me. It has been really difficult for me to come to the realization that life will forever be different between me and John. It will never again be "just us". We now have a beautiful baby boy who needs us and who depends on us for everything. This next phase of life is so great and amazing because it is different than anything we have ever experienced! John is so caring and thoughtful, I can't imagine what it would be like to raise a little human being with anyone else. For one, who else would put up with this crazy-hormonal-sleep deprived-sometimes grouchy new mommy? Haha, I kid but I am thankful for him.

 For any women out there whose uterus do somersaults when the see pictures of my baby (or any baby) please heed my advice: STRENGTHEN YOUR MARRIAGE FIRST. This is the foundation on which your future will be built. Children do not make up for any lack of love you feel, or make issues or problems go away. They do not take away loneliness or fill any type of void. If anything, having a child will make any and every issue you thought you dealt with rise to the surface once again. Healthy marriages = healthy kids.